"Larry" Hadder?

Eric can let his hair go. We're talking I'm-protesting-a-war messy and I'm-a-teenager-go-away long. After some convincing and strong-arming my 6 foot 3 son,we got in the car in search for Great Clips. With the wait as long as 1 hour, and me unsure how long I could keep Eric in captivity, we drove around looking for inspiration and found it in an old fashioned barber shop. Perfect, I thought! We walked in and we were greeted by a old man. Old fashioned shop, old man. I guess it figures. Pleasant enough, he beaconed Eric to the chair and began to cut. Now this guy was really good - and he could talk while he worked. And just to prove it, he talked incessantly. He asked my son his name - Eric he answered. This guy said "Harry"? Eric shook his head. "Terry"? Again a shake. "Steven"? I am trying to fight off laughing. The barber gamely tries one more time and asks Eric to spell it. E-R-I-C. "Oh, Larry!" At this I start laughing and look at the other barber. I can tell he is laughing too, but something in his eye told me the old guy wasn't trying to be funny. Was he thinking:


Or worse:



No clue from us - or him - for that matter. So Eric was Larry for the barber's entire monologue. He is such a good kid - he just went with it. I tipped the guy $4 and we made it just outside the door until we broke into laughter. This is one hair cut we will both remember. It was Ha-Larry-ous! (And I didn't make this up to drop a bad pun, I swear - ask Eric!)

It's Punny to Me

I LOVE PUNS. Another one of my guilty pleasures - RockBand, Pepsi Max, KFC, really super soft socks, candles and puns. Read no further, you just described me.

Now there is no substitute for puns on the run - those little nuggets of funny that present themselves without planning. You know the ones that practically make themselves. And after all the immediate groaning, everyone laughs. Well I can't recreate those, but i thought I would give you some of my favorites. Somewhere Richard Milenkovich is smiling.

1. I couldn't remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
2. There was a sign on the lawn at the rehab drug center that said "Keep off the Grass"
3. Just in...a hole has been found in the wall of a nudist camp. The police are looking into it.
4. And in local news, police responded to a call from a daycare center. Seems a 3-year old was resisting a rest.
5. William was going to join the army until he heard his drill sargeant yell "Fire at Will"
6. To write with a broken pencil is just pointless.
7. What's the definition of a "will"? P.S. it's a dead giveaway.
8. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
9. The toy gun was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
10. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
11. What do you call someone else's cheese? Nacho cheese.
12. Be true to your teeth or they will be false to you.
13. A man clothed in nothing but saran wrap asked his doctor if he would diagnose him as insane. Absolutely, the doctor said, I can see your nuts.
14. The invisible man married the transparent woman. And their kids were nothing to look at either.
15. Someone was running a flea circus, but a dog came and stole the show.
16. Pills with long names are quite a mouthful.
17. Tennis players don't marry because Love means nothing to them.
18. Other girls like the word "marriage" because it has a nice ring to it.
19. I'd like to go to Holland one day. Wooden shoe?
20. When a man got shot with a BB gun, the case ended up in a pellet court.
21. I just saw Finding Nemo. What did you think of it, on a scale of 1 -10?

Darrell Weighs in on our Rock Band success

Find out what Darrell thinks of our Rock Band success here.

I don't get no respect!

Pure Nerd Joy

Introducing our "band" - Thanks for the Candy. Our maiden battle resulted in #2 - and so close to #1. Fantastic when you consider so many "bands" competed! How I love to play Rock Band...even better is being so good (and humble, right). Now how nerdy is that?! I rest my case.

My Valentine

I wanted to post some things about my favorite Valentine.

1. Darrell is the kindest, most patient person I have EVER met. This is no joke - even with the prednisone, which is a steriod and notorious for mood swings and personality glitches, you would never know with him. He just keeps plugging away, in the moment, without any anger for his health or circumstances. He is such an inspiration to me.

2. Darrell is the best dad ever. He calls them all honey and sweetheart. He always has time to watch a skit, a performance, watch Max dance, have Eric tell him the latest physics experiment, or support Bryanna's endless demands from soccer. He gets up early, goes to bed late, pays for lessons, trips, etc. all for the sake of enriching their lives. He can skimp for us, but is helplessly generous with our kids. I like it.

3. He is honestly spiritual. Long before we joined the LDS Church, Darrell was active spiritually. Growing up Nazarene, he has always had the Lord as a focus in his life. He serves quietly, completely without the need for praise or recognition. I am grateful to his parents for setting a good example for him and being dedicated to their faith. Anyone that loves and serves the Lord is good people in the book of Michelle.

4. He is my very best friend. I can (and do) talk to him about everything. No subject, no experience is off limits. When we were dating, I remember thinking this is a guy I could have children with, doesn't micromanage what I do (think RockBand or endless 2-liters of diet pepsi), would love me even if I were in a wheelchair, and is the one I would choose to take to Disneyland. Yep, this is the guy for me! Even when I am upset with him, he is still the person's advice I seek. How lame is that? He has been everything a best friend, girl or guy, should be. I could tell you stories of our outrageous fun and silliness together, but I think I will keep that all to myself. (I know silently you are thanking me for not sharing!)

5. Darrell is so intelligent. When we met, he didn't even have his associates degree, and I thought "are you kidding?" I used to refer to him as my diamond in the rough. An accounting and law degree later, he is able to earn a better living. I am such a fan of education for everyone. Remember, he has no need for praise or attention, so he is quietly smart. Doesn't try to take over the conversation to show you how smart he is, or to sway you to his position. He is often underestimated in his profession - and this is to his advantage. He isn't a jerk, or screaming, or cussing, or taking a hardline position just to prove a point or just because he can. There is a movie line that says "never let them see you coming" and Darrell personifies this. I have seen him do this over and over again in court. He has the opposing party, counsel or police officer boxed in the corner and they never saw it coming. I think this is very funny. I am way too obvious.

Thank you for letting me tell you about my favorite Valentine. Bryanna gave a talk about gratitude in Church last Sunday, and one thing she said was "I am so grateful for my parents. If they were to suddenly go away, I would be so lost". I agree wholeheartedly about Bryanna's dad. Let's hope we never have to experience that feeling.

I love you honey! You are my Valentine.

The Inner Workings of My Mind

Nap time - I am finally able to close my eyes. A chance to get away from the stress and worries of the day and forget. I am quiet and drift away. I am floating in an indeterminate blue and green mass - it takes me a moment to realize it is the ocean. I have no idea how I got here, but I can almost feel the water, and somehow I know it is very deep. The water is calm. I take its cue and begin to relax. Quietly, without rapid, frantic movement or warning, I am acutely aware of another presence. I can't see anything, but suddenly I know I am in very real danger. That feeling that washes over you - the hair standing up at the back of your neck. It quickly occurs to me what is in the ocean right next to me. A great white shark. And I am terrified. But afraid as I am, I remember that there was nothing else near me. No boat, no shoreline, nothing to swim to or anywhere to go. I am totally trapped and the feeling of helplessness is overwhelming to me. I can see this predator so clearly in my mind's eye. I know that if I reach out, I can touch it- it's that close to me. I can envision its teeth and the damage it could do to me. We are just floating together, no hurry, no movement, almost indecision. But I am absolutely petrified. I have to do something. From the recesses of my mind, I remind myself that I am only dreaming. That this is a horrible feeling but I can somehow try to make it stop - I can get away. I try to will myself to wake up. Have you ever done this? It's a horrible feeling.... I am trying to shout at myself to wake up before the menacing shark has a chance to tear me to shreds. Finally - and I don't know how long it took - I force my eyes open and lay in the dark sweating. I contemplate the meaning of the dream, and know it's pretty obvious. I got away this time, but I know the "shark" is just around the corner. Waiting for me. And there isn't anything I can do about it.